Afrer preliminary greetings, I said immediately I was a bit high. Stress related. Broken sleep patterns, and a little bit of mania from other people.
For example, My new fuel card, which is a discount card for petrol arrived, obviously addressed to me, with my name on the card arrived. My husband somehow opened it thinking it was a replacement for his card, which is on it's due date. We had this ridiculous conversation.
He said the discount company had sent his card with the wrong name on it... mine. I said actually it's my card, I asked for a new one because mine wasn't working in the machine the last couple of times I used it and the garage had to stop and type in the number.
No, he said it's my card, I need a new card. So I said well you need to order one with your name on it.
well you give me your old card then, so I repeated, my old card won't work in the machine, and no doubt it will be cancelled anyway.
well I want this new card he said, so I said, ... but it's got my name on it and I need to sign it, it's my card.
I said You need to phone and ask for a new card. Give me your old card says he. So I dig out my old card, and guess what it's got his name on it, and yes I signed it on the back.... this is on the way to the psychiatrists appointment, and my seatbelt wasn't working properly.
This is when I get a massive instant ocular migraine behind one of my eyes, not always the same one, but definitely a left or right one! This was the right. I gave him my old card.
He has a knack of winding me up just a bit before I see the psychiatrist!
Anyway we discussed all the other stuff going on, and that I had proffered my own view of my current mood level which resulted in the offer of two weeks of olanzapine to just give me the edge over this elevation. I actually declined and didn't leave with the prescription. We agreed to meet in two weeks and see how thing we're going.
I think because I was so thrown by the episode on the journey and this dialogue over the card, I forgot that I wouldn't be available for the next appointment, and that It would in fact be better to take 10 days of olanzapine at 5mg nighttime to get my sleep patterns right, and do whatever, as it means I will sleep for about 10 hours, than allow myself to continue possibly sleep deprived, and in danger of actually going high and missing out on a very big treat my husband has organised for my 60th birthday.
I suppose some people will say that the card conversation is possibly unreasonable by the esteemed husband, but they all get their wires crossed! The trouble is if I am a bit high it sounds completely bizarre and like insanity has broken loose all round.
We did discuss the Catalan situation. She is so worried. The companies are leaving, people will be out of work, families are against each other, and She says she can't believe how the hatred has erupted and permeated through people who got on with each other before. I could empathise, Brexit has done the same to the UK.
We both agreed that the two votes had not been thought through, the consequences, and the possible ramifications. She is genuinely fearful for her Catalonia, She is worried it will become like Basque situation.
We we talked about the Trump-Kim situation.
We talked about the responsibility of spending money, enjoying spending money, and that without spending money, people don't get employment, and the local economy stagnates.
When I got picked up by the beloved husband, I explained that my psychiatrist and I had decided spending money was a social responsibility. This was to give a bit of payback for the card episode!
Anyway I have to get up early tomorrow, so I will start taking the Olanzapine Saturday night and see how many days I need it for. To be honest, I probably have been forgetting to take the Depakote both morning and evening for about a month, so it's par for the course.
Its a pity I need to take drugs to put up with the weird world I live in but heh, better to have a great life most of the time, than a revolving door at the psychiatric unit. The thing is, I quite enjoy being out of it at the psychiatric ward. People are so normal!