Anyway, the problem wall that I spent a week looking for matching tiles on the advice of the builder, then ordered and paid for.. .. .. now turns out the wall is not to be a good enough surface to tile. I just wonder why these people can't give sound advice. Perhaps he thought I wouldn't find the tiles? I decided I would just have to sand this down and try to make it good myself. I may as well fill all the cracks in this kitchen and give it another coat of kitchen paint, just to finished it so it can be let.
The final touch up on the paintwork in one of the bedrooms has been done in a different colour! Thankfully only in one room. It has made it look like yellow stains all over the place. So yes I had a very low day yesterday. I decided not to have one today! I gave myself a good talking to.
I think 'positivity' is a choice of thinking. Once I have an action plan I always feel better. I don't like things going wildly out of control. Sometimes much as I want to do the very best I can with everything, I have to accept that something isn't good and decide to live with it, and not make it important to me any longer.
The most important thing to me is my Husband, our friendship and being there for each other. I told him 'we got through everything else, we will get through this too'. Then we both felt better.
We have some wonderful friends, that is the biggest treasure. People who can give moral support and encouragement, and not pile on the doom and gloom when you feel down anyway.
We each of us has times and people that just seem to stretch us more than we feel we can bear, but if you are sitting here reading this, and me sat here writing it, we have both got through a lot of difficulties in our lives.
I don't think we have to bear more than we can cope with, even though it feels like it. I think these things help us to know ourselves. We can never know who we are unless we are truly challenged.
So because I found that little mantra such a warming and joyful feeling when I said it yesterday, even though I don't know where i found the heart to say it, perhaps if you are reading this and struggling, you might like me to say it to you too!
'We got through everything else, we will get through this too'.
God bless you and make His wings to protect you from harm.
I think when I feel completely empty and can't go on, that's when God shows us the way forward, and even if we take little shuffling steps that way, and we don't get there quickly, we will definatly not have to turn back for setting out in the wrong direction. Trust yourself to make the right decisions, you know something is wrong if it hurts someone else when it doesn't need to.
It is too late to say we chose the wrong course of action, you can only make the choices you make today, the ones already made will run their course for better or worse.
I do think we have a choice on how to view those choices. Either as mistakes we can never recover from, or an opportunity to learn a new way of thinking and doing. Will it make a difference? Yes because we live with such a burden of guilt and anxiety over making a wrong decision.
We give ourselves the space and opportunity to make good choices when we are not burdened with regret and remorse. The last person that is prepared to forgive us, is ourselves. I am trying to make this a number one priority today!
I chose the Builder!
Peace and courage!